Spiritual Direction

What Is a Spiritual Director?

A spiritual director is someone who will companion you on your spiritual journey. Just as UU Wellspring as a group supports your spiritual journey, a spiritual companion can hold space for you to process more deeply or simply to have the space to speak your truths out loud to someone  who will hold confidentiality and help you learn to understand and trust your inner voice.

Rev. Kelly Dignan explores spiritual direction in the first video and Rev. Sara Lewis and Linnea Nelson share the value of spiritual direciton in the second video, which is titled for “Religious Eductors” but it is appropriate for all seekers.

One of the five spokes of UU Wellspring is outside spiritual direction; having someone outside the group helps offer perspective during the sometimes challenging work we do in our groups.

You may choose to engage a spiritual director in the more traditional sense, or find a spiritual companion — someone to be in conversation with, who is not necessarily trained but who takes the role of companionship seriously.

There are various kinds of companionship: all are valid, each with a different flavor:

• Certified spiritual directors are paid companions who are trained to listen deeply and have resources uniquely used to deepen a mentee’s spiritual journey. Check www.uusdn.org/wellspring or www.sdicompanions.org for suggestions.
• Spiritual Direction Groups are groups that UU Wellspring puts together annually for small group direction.
  
• Religious professionals (ministers, chaplains, religious educators, music directors) may not have formal training in spiritual direction, but do adhere to a code of professional ethics.
• Other companions who may not have the training but can still create deep relationships with the participant; they may be a long-time mentor or someone not in your Wellspring group but who has taken UU Wellspring and is willing to be a conversation partner. Please contact Director@uuwellspring.org for support materials.

Choosing a Spiritual Companion

Here are some things to think about when choosing a spiritual companion:

• Is this someone who can listen attentively and put your needs above everything else in the conversation?
• Is this someone who seems grounded in their own spirituality (and/or are they in spiritual direction themselves)?
• Is this person a personal friend, and can you set aside time separate from your relationship? (How will you differentiate between time as friends versus time in spiritual conversation?)
• Is there some reciprocal remuneration (gifts, payment, barter for services)?
• Are you okay with someone from a different faith tradition? If so, are you willing to spend time on definitions and explanations of your faith?
• Is this a relationship that will not suffer if you interview them and turn them down? (This could impact friendships/congregational relationships.)
• If this person is a psychotherapist, do they understand the difference between spiritual direction and psychological talk therapy?
• Can they help you with spiritual discernment without solving your problems?

This essay by Rev. Tina Simpson, “Is it OK to Talk to You About This Stuff?” may be helpful in your conversations with a potential spiritual companion.

Ready to Find a Spiritual Director?

You can find certified spiritual directors at UU Spiritual Direction Network and Spiritual Directors International (SDI). Recognize that these are professionals who often, but not always offer a pro bono session or a short call. Use your time to read the bios carefully and choose the one you think might work well for you. There is no need to interview multiple directors once you identify one to try out.